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I've heard there is a lot of controversy over GTA IV because of the content.
It's not that much more violent than the previous GTA games. It is very much an "adult" game, though. There are tons of drug references, lots of bad language and sexual innuendos, partial nudity, and lots of violence, of course.
It's plenty violent, but the game is only as violent as YOU make it. You CAN run people over, but you are not compelled to, for example. There IS a strip club and there ARE prostitutes, but you never are required to visit them.
In my mind, it's not as violent or adult themed as games like The Darkness or Manhunt, but it is way beyond games like Call of Duty. In the end, it is probably a game that parents should let their kids play only under supervision.